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The Dog That Had No Friends

– We were recently travelling through Canada, and after a hard day’s ride stopped at the Lion Inn, and the occupants of the coach, numbering about nine persons, soon gathered round the cheerful fire. In the room we observed an ill-looking cur*, which had shown his sagacity by taking up his quarters in so comfortable an apartment. After a few moments the landlord entered, and observing the specimen of the canine species, remarked –

  • “Fine dog that! Is he yours, sir?” approaching one of the passengers.

  • “No, sir,” was the reply.

  • “Beautiful dog! Yours, sir?” he said, addressing himself to another.

  • “No,” was the blunt reply.

  • “Come here, pup,” said he. “Perhaps he is yours, sir??”

  • “No,” was the reply.

  • “Very sagacious animal! Belongs to you, I suppose, sir?”

  • “No, he doesn’t,” was the answer.

  • “Then he is yours, and you have a treasure,” said he, throwing the animal a cracker**.

  • “Nothing of the kind.”

  • “Oh,” said he, with a smile, “he belongs to you, as a matter of course?” addressing the last passenger.

  • “Wouldn’t have him as a gift,” said the last person.

  • “Then you dirty, mean, contemptible whelp, git out!” and with that the host gave the poor dog such a kick as sent him yelling into the street.


  • *cur is an inferior dog or one of mixed breed.

  • ** in North America, cracker refers to a dry, thin, and crisp savoury biscuit that developed from military hardtack and nautical ship biscuits.

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The Collected Songs of Charles Mackay

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